What I did for love??????

The phone rings. I looked down at the phone. The Name and number immediately sent my mind reminiscing. It took me back to the fall of 2002.

I was young and just started the 10th grade. I was newly out of the closet( The summer before, my Godmother found out I was having an affair with my piano player a few years my senior!). I was free! LOL But I digress. Being involved in a local youth organization ( I wont say what), gave me the privilege to work with a lot of people my age. This was normally in a courtroom. I was normally the person who wanted to make these youth look bad for what they have done. I walk up to the podium, notes in hand, ready to expose everything bad about the person sitting before. When I stepped up to the podium and looked into his eyes, I froze. I, Antony Larry, the "Steel Magnolia", " Iron Man", the one without any stage fright, froze. My eyes met his eyes. I began to fix the invisible bang on my head( its something I do when I'm nervous, Thanks Kathy).

Finally, I began to question him. I didn't need my notes. I just listened to him and asked silly, standard questions. Once he smiled, I only had one question that I obviously kept to myself: Your place or mine?

That night, I got to know him. It was my first relationship and his. It was so cute! He came to my house and asked my Godmother if he could take me out on a date. (She pretended to be tough but really thought he was a cutie!) We dated for several months before exchanging a "Special" gift that we could only give one time in our lives.

I loved him with all my heart. He loved me with everything that was in him. I cant put down in words how I have hurt over the years because of this " Young love". My first love.

If I'm honest with myself, I broke up with him because I knew he would one day leave me( Or so I thought).

That's regret. Whats funny is I don't regret anything else that happen but for some reason, leaving him is what I do regret. ( Karma is a bitch: He rejected me several times after that and till this day we have a love hate relationship)

Should I regret that? No. I'm reminded of that song in " A Chorus Line" What I did for Love
Kiss today goodbye
And point me toward tomorrow
We did what we had to do
Won't forget, can't regret
What I did for love

In love, we cant regret anything.

Love is never gone. As we travel on, loves what we'll remember.

I know that's what I remember.

When I looked back down at the phone, It said "Missed call". The moment was over. The call was done. A message was left on my answering machine. Plain and Simple: I love you, baby.

I said "I love you too" into the mirror. That's what I did for love

Antony