"Trust me, I'm working it out"

“Trust me, Im working it out”  These words have come to mind a lot recently. I recently saw “The Help”. The movie was about housekeepers in  the south back in the early 60s. One of the women who raised me was a housekeeper, Godmother Shirley. From as a long as I can remember, she was my best friend and not only that, she was woman who took care of everyone. As a child, I would speak to her on the phone while she was at work but we had to be very cautious because she was calling me from the houses of the people she worked for(this was when cellphones were not such a staple to  the common family). She would call and check on me, make sure I was doing ok and had a good day at school etc. She worked for a family that was prominent in town. To this day, I’m not exactly sure what they did but whatever it was, it sure made a lot of money! The Patriarch of the family loved my Godmother. He always said “Dont worry about anything, Shirley. Trust me, I’m working it out!”. A few days after his funeral, they read his will and Godmother was sure she would have something.....NOTHING. After years of taking care of this family, not a cent. Not a dime. She was crushed! As hurt as she was, that didn’t stop her for doing what she was called to do- Taking care of people. She said to me “ It don't matter. God’s working it out!” 

Let’s flash forward 10 years. There she was still doing what she felt she had been called to do day in and day out. One day, out of nowhere, she gets a letter and a check from another family she had worked for tirelessly, never complaining about the conditions or her own pains. The letter said “we are so thankful for everything you are doing for us. You haven’t given up on us or failed us. You have been so faithful to us. We love you so much, Shirley. You are family.” The check was an amount that she could never imagine or would have ever expected and the checks continued to come until the day she died. 

Just because we can’t see how things are being worked out or the things we expect don’t come through when we want them to, that doesn’t mean that the plans aren’t being worked out for us. 

Let’s keep the faith, keep working tirelessly to what we know we are suppose to do and know that God is right by us, even when we think He isn’t, saying

 “Trust me, I’m working it out”

..It was only the beginning

I never thought that I would would survive as long as I have. It all happen so fast. A girl entered the room with an envelope that looked to have pictures in it. The phone rang and my best friend Kathy went into the office to answer it. I stopped teaching the class to greet the girl at the door. I instructed them to look over their music. The girl handed me the envelope with a smile on her face. I replied with a thank you. I turned around to go back to teaching the class and saw Kathy come out of the office. I could see by the look in her eyes and the redness of her face that she was fighting back tears. Everyone in the class knew something was wrong...except me. She walked towards me and said we needed to talk outside. As we walked toward the double doors, my mind knew this wasn't good news. After we stepped outside, she said "Antony.." . She paused and began to choke up. "She's gone to heaven". I just stood there for a moment in disbelief. So many thoughts ran through my head. I screamed. I screamed so loud that a teacher from the classroom next to  us walked out to see what was wrong. It was at that moment I realized that I would never be what I thought was "normal" again. It was at that moment that I realized my heart had been full even though I always thought it wasn't. That was the moment I realized my heart had a lost a place that could never be filled. It was the beginning of heartache. It was the beginning of pain that never stops. It was.....life.