During the Christmas season, I don’t listen to much holiday music. Sometimes, its just to much! I’m one of those people who gets really tired of hearing the same thing over and over again! It seems like every year they start playing Christmas music earlier and earlier....Am I wrong? This year, radio stations seemed to start playing it on Thanksgiving day!(maybe they do it every year but in my mind it’s way too early this year.)
One song that I always love is a song made popular by Amy Grant called “ Breath of Heaven”. It’s known as “Mary’s song”. I remember hearing it many years ago while performing for a local event in my hometown sung by a young woman who portrayed Mary. I loved the melody and its simplicity. It wasn’t until this year that I really understood deeply the lyrics. They seem to stand out to me and be so relevant.
From the surface, it just seems to be Jesus’ mom saying “ Listen God, you gave me this baby and it ain’t easy. Help me. Not saying I can’t do it, I can.... but not without you”
How is that relevant for a young black male? (For the record, I am not pregnant and I’m too full off Piss, Vinegar, and Vodka to carry God’s son!)
I am waiting in a silent prayer. I am frightened by the load I bare. In a world as cold as stone, must I walk this path alone? Be with me now, Be with me now.
That lyric alone describes what we all feel to be true at times. Being honest with yourself, you know that you’ve had time when it feels almost overwhelming. Especially when you know you’ve done everything according to what you felt is right. When things don’t go right, you start to ask questions:
Do you wonder, as you watch my face if a wiser one, should have had my place?
Am I where I should be? Am I doing this right? Did I listen to the wrong voice? What have I done?
This is human! These are real, legitimate questions!
No matter what your personal answers are, Mary’s prayer is a good reply. You know she had doubts! Young, prego, unmarried! She was scared out of her mind! She did the only thing she could:
But I offer all I am, for the mercy of your plan. Help me be strong. Help me be. Help me.
She said “Help me be strong”. “Help me be”.... JUST HELP ME!
That was an honest prayer. This very real example of fear, exhaustion, doubt, confusion....i’m sure some anger, is a very real prayer for so many people today including myself. Mary held on through the mystery of why this was happening to her and what this all meant. She had those fears but continued on, believing that everything would be ‘ok’ because she was chosen and loved. She believed with everything that was in her that she did hold inside of her the strength to get through this....Literally. She survived. Guess what? We will too. Inside of us is that same strength.
Breath of heaven, hold me together. Be forever near me. Breath of heaven. Breath of heaven, lighten my darkness, pour over me your holiness, for you are holy. Breath of heaven.
Link to the song
